How to Manage Your Destructive Anger in a Positive Way?

Anger in you could be just mild irritation or a disastrous fury. Some of us may get agitated at a waiter in the restaurant for no reason at all and may realise the folly later on. Some people have worse manifestations of anger. I used to know a young mother who would mercilessly beat her child if the latter failed to come first in class or did not bag a prize in a competition. The mother vented her anger even by banging her fists against the wall. It went on until the daughter grew up to gift her mother with books on how to control anger.

Though anger is unhealthy and can have dangerous and catastrophic results it is a perfectly normal human emotion. Anger prepares the body to fight. Anger is also helpful as a response to threats. It becomes a real problem when anger forces you to do things, which you would not have done otherwise. It keeps your blood pressure high and may cause heart attack or stroke. Anger also alienates you from society.

Manage your anger well with some of these well known techniques.

  • This is something you might have heard many times. Control your actions triggered by anger and count to 10. Some of us will need to count a long time before our anger cools down. But if you practice this you will see that the count decreases gradually and you start cooling down faster.
  • Breathe in slowly and deeply and think! Apply all your reason and logic on anger.
  • Try not to talk much when you are angry. You may probably say something you will have to regret later. Communicate and deal with the problem only when you are calm and cool.
  • Practise relaxation techniques. Yoga, meditation or daily exercises are known to help. In a stressful environment it is required to de-stress yourself. Take some time out to think about your anger. What is it that makes you angry? Even if your rage is triggered by a person, it could point to some issues from the past or something happening in the present.
  • Try spending some time alone when you are angry. Calm yourself down in a quiet place. It would be nice if you can go out for a walk. Analyse the situation that got you all worked up.
  • If you think it would help, talk it out with a dear one. You may succeed in controlling your pent up emotion for quite a while but it may burst out eventually. In such cases, a friend or a counsellor would help.
  • Think happy and flush out those negative feelings from your mind. Add some humour to your life.
  • Some wise men make productive use of their anger by painting, writing or blogging.
  • Reading about emotions like anger or fear often helps in handling them.
  • Avoid people and situations, which make you angry. If someone is forcing you into it try to reason it out to them.
  • It is advisable to forget things, which hurt you. Things or people from the past keep on gnawing at you making it difficult for you to forgive and forget. Forgiving becomes easy and practical only if those undesirable things don’t happen to you anymore. It is extremely difficult but remember that you are doing it for yourself and not for others. When you forgive somebody you are in fact relaxing yourself and reducing your blood pressure.

If you still feel that your anger is a curse causing hiccups in your familial relations, friendships, work environment or in your day-to-day life consult a counsellor or medical practitioner without delay.

Additional Reading

Managing Anger

Habitual Anger Kills: Linked to Heart Disease

Anger Management Methods For Children 5 To 8 Years Old

All Natural Products For Brain and Memory Function

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